by The Good Life on September 4, 2018

in America, France, Friends

I suppose I’ve been thinking about this post for a while, and now being a parent to 2 kids, I could say that I maybe have a little introduction into this field, but fully realize that me and my wonderful wife are at the beginning of the journey of being a parent.  Not sure if its going to weddings recently and seeing proud parents seeing their kids get married which spurred this on, but I suppose the enormity of being a parent is slowly dawning on me.
Its funny, before you have kids, you think about it but dont really know what to expect and no matter the preparation you cant really know what to expect, how the child will be or more importantly how you and your partner will be as parents.  Tired, exhausted parents sometimes too, which just makes things extra interesting.
But yes, you take a drivers test with lessons to drive a car and even when you have that license you know how stop start those first days with a car can be stalling on hills.  I guess thats kind of like being a parent, figuring it out as you go but usually you dont get lessons before hand.
I mean, think about university, you spend 4 years learning (after 11 or so years at school) to get a job of varying difficulties.  With parenting, you conceive and then 9 months later you are on arguably the toughest job you will ever get.  One where your boss changes their mind every few minutes, is tired and hungry quite often and mad at you quite a bit too.  You can try reasoning or bargaining with them or explaining you will have it done by end of day but with this little ball of fun thats not quick enough.  They want Juice now.  Like right now.
So whats the point of this blog?  Well basically just to pat each and every parent out there on the back.  Me and my wife are in the midst of a 2 year old and 6 month old and doing our very best and are very blessed to have happy and healthy kids but there isn’t an evening when we dont slump down on the couch at the end of a long day and just look at each other and breathe a long sigh out followed by a glass of rose like “yes, we made it through another day”.
 Only to go to bed and then get feet and elbows in the face from one of the kids who wants to sleep in our bed.  But at that same moment there is a feeling of being immensely proud of how we are doing, like many other parents juggling work, having no family around (maybe an 11 hr plane ride to the nearest family) and balancing just life and everything it throws at you.  I’m proud of the fact that we cover for each other to go work out, we encourage each other to go and see friends and that we take our kids everywhere.
Like I say I feel like we’re in the lucky side of things as there are single parents out there doing it, people with sick children and all I have is admiration for both.  As I said above, being a parent can be the toughest job on earth on a good day, but with an added element I can only imagine.
Its also to see how you each change and deal with becoming a parent.  My wife has become like a diaper carrying, multi snack holding superhero ready for any adventure at the drop of the hat.  I guess I know where she gets it from…
That said, there is nothing that compares to having your son or daughter look at you and smile, laugh, run over and give you a hug.  Thats a feeling like no other.  So far we have been lucky enough to take our son snowboarding, he has hung on my back surfing and hiked all around the Pacific Northwest on our backs and our daughter is about to do the same.  We’re actually headed for Europe soon, on her first flight to Europe so 11 hours with these two will be all sorts of fun.  
The one thing we’ve struggled with which maybe because we lived in Europe is the schedule thing.  We’ve tried but then It seemed like I wouldn’t ever see the kids with me getting home late and them going to bed early and so thats probably not helping us, but I wouldn’t swap those hours in the evening for anything.  That and the co-sleeping but otherwise its been great.
As my mother would say about her mum “kids just need to eat and sleep.  Make sure they get food regularly and they will be content, make sure they sleep enough and they will remain in a decent mood”.  Both my mother and grandmother were very simple in their outlook but also made the best of their surroundings and situations (my mum was born in London in 1942 during the war so you can imagine what my grandmother went through those first 3 years with bombings on London every day with her husband away with the Royals Fusiliers in the British Army).  Thats a pretty good leveler to think about situations others are in, and I know we are extremely lucky but thats the point of this blog.
I look around and see families with friends with 3 and 4 kids and have only admiration for how they are getting through days.  So I just wanted to say big ups, props to every parent out there holding it all together.  You are a star and deserve a medal yourself.  And to hope that my mother and grand mother are somewhere looking down proud of the job we are doing with our two kids.
Writing this did make me think though that sometimes Parenting can make you feel like its just you and your partner going through it, deep in the trenches, balancing kids, life, work etc and then I started thinking about amazing parents I know.  Sometimes as I say you can feel a bit like its you and your partner alone but there loads others going through various stages right now.  Just ask for help or advice at any stage.  So that kind of spurred me on to write the next post below thinking about some of the rad dads and mums out there who I look up too….

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